Teens can really know how to press your buttons if you let them. Do you feel that you are talking and not getting through to your teen? Every time you say something they do the opposite of what you ask as of them.
Remember these 4 tips and you will see a difference!
1. Act as if they hear you
2. Be clear and calm
3. Put your foot down "you rules are your rules"
4. No excuse for a abuse
Teens play the "I can't hear you game" because they CAN... They may not have control of taking away your rules but, they do have the choice to rather listen to you are ignore you. They choose the ignore route. It's a easy excuse (so they think) not to have to do what you ask of them.
For example, You have asked your teen son to make sure he pick up all his dirty clothes before he has his friends come over. He doesn't reply but you use tip number 1 "Act as if they hear you". You leave and come back all to find out that he did not do as instructed. Your natural reaction is to go upside his head and tell him about how he doesn't follow your rules and how he doesn't listen. No need for that! Simply apply tips 2 & 3. Be clear to him that because he refuse to clean up the dirty clothes of the floor his friends are not allowed to come over. Your teen may then claim he or she didn't hear you. No worries! Tell them let's try again tomorrow and maybe they can come over after you have done what is asked of them. Effectively communicate that "your friends can't come over in an unclean environment". Then, turn around and walk off not giving him the opportunity to argue with you.
Your teen may not understand it now. In the future this will help your teen understand that you were just helping them become great leaders for the future. These tips help you stay in control, teach them the importance of responsibility, following directions and being accountable for their actions.
If you deal with a child that talks back or become verbally or physically abusive here is a
helpful tool: